If our lives are changing then it kind of makes sense that our wardrobes change too. I work with ladies whose lives are often changing from kids leaving home to them leaving corporate life to retire or to set up their own business, through to changes in their relationship status such as divorce through to starting dating again.
In this period of change, wearing clothes that feel familiar and safe can make us feel comfortable but for some people, this comfort can wear off and they can end up feeling that they don’t like the clothes in their wardrobe any more, that they don’t reflect who they are today and they want to make a change but they don’t know where to start. If this feels like you, then you will find this video really useful. I do this exercise with my clients as a first step to discovering who they really are, and what that means in terms of their style and clothing choices going forward.
I see this so many times with clients that no matter how chatty and giggly they are when they arrive, when I ask them to get in front of the mirror so I can begin their consultation, for some, everything changes. The head goes down and the giggling stops. For some of my clients, this simple task can be a real challenge. When they look in the mirror, they look for the flaws and the things that they don’t like about themselves. They point out the wrinkles, the dark circles under the eyes and the blemishes. What they don’t see are the beautiful eyes, the healthy glowing skin and the gorgeous smile.
You see, this is where I think guys get lucky! As women, one of the first tasks we do every day is to stand in front of the mirror to look for our flaws so we can disguise them with make-up. We actually hunt out the under eye circles, the scars and the blemishes so that we can cover them with make-up. Guys, generally, get to avoid this daily routine. And the thing is, that if we are not careful, this negative self-talk can really impact our self-esteem and our confidence and lets be honest, that is not a great way to start our day.
You see, if we met a friend for lunch and she launched into how bad her wrinkles are, or the blemish on her cheek, I am guessing that we would go out of our way to reassure her and tell her how lovely she looked. We would point out her gorgeous smile or her sparkling eyes. We would tell her how great she looked. But when it comes to ourselves, we miss this out.
This weekend, I had the privilege to work with a lady who was in her mid 60’s and she had the most beautiful skin and incredible piercing eyes, but all she could tell me about was how she was ageing with wrinkles and dark circles under the eyes. She just did not see what I, or her daughter who accompanied her, saw. If she had told me she was 46 I would have believed her! She agreed with me that when she looked in a mirror, she looked for the negatives and she agreed to try to stop and instead, point out the positives whilst applying her make-up.
So, January is a time to make a new start and this is my task for you. When you put on your make-up each day, by all means, look for and disguise the flaws because that in itself gives us confidence, but also, talk to yourself as if you are your own best friend. Find the positives and tell yourself how lovely you look and lets start the day on a completely different note.
There are so many better ways to spend your hard-earned cash than on clothes that end up in wardrobes and drawers and never get worn and yet whenever I do Wardrobe Edits with Clients, I see them lurking in the background with the tell-tale label still attached. When I ask Clients why they don’t wear an item, it is normally “it was an impulse buy and I didn’t have time to take it back” or “I needed something so I thought it would do”.
If you added up how much you have spent on clothes that don’t get worn that are currently hanging in your wardrobe, how much would it amount to? £100, £500 or more? What could you do with that extra money – especially with Christmas approaching!
So, next time that you are in the changing room, trying on, here are 2 questions that I want you to ask yourself…
Do I Love It?
So, when you try it on, does it make you feel great, so great that actually you don’t want to take it off? I recently had a Personal Shopping trip with a client of mine and what was great about this particular client was that no matter how good an item looked on her, if it wasn’t an item that she loved, she did not buy it! She was honest enough with me – and herself – to admit that if she did not love it, she would probably not wear it and so we left it in the store. I loved this about her because I knew that when she did buy an item, it was something she was not only going to wear, but love wearing and that is what I want for all of my clients!
Does it go with at least 3 other items that I own?
I also have Clients tell me that they do not wear an item because they have nothing to wear with it. I have a simple rule that I do not already own at least 3 items that it will go with, then I will leave it in the Store. Getting dressed should be easy so we can just grab say a top and a pair of trousers and off we go and this is how we build a really flexible wardrobe.
So, next time you are in the changing room, please ask yourself these 2 simple questions and if the answer to one or both – then please leave the item in the shop and go and find something else; something that you will love to wear and that makes you feel fabulous!
I hope that you find this helpful! Please drop some comments below and let me know if this is something you will try next time you are on a shopping trip
Catch up soon,